How to deal with pet loss in the workplace
Losing a pet can affect every part of life, including your mental health and ability to do your job. Whether you’re struggling with pet loss yourself or supporting a bereaved colleague, our guide offers practical advice on how to navigate this specific type of grief in the workplace.
Jump to:
For many people, pets are family. So when a pet dies, grief can affect far more than emotions alone. It can impact concentration, confidence, sleep, energy levels and daily routines – including how we cope at work.
Our Pet Grief Survey found that 92% of employed respondents said their grief affected their ability to work to some extent, while 77% believed pet loss is not taken seriously enough in workplaces.**
Going back to work after pet loss can be really difficult. Some people may need time off, while others may prefer the distraction of work but still struggle emotionally behind the scenes. And many worry that colleagues or employers won’t understand the depth of their grief.
The loss of a pet can be deeply significant because animals often become important attachment figures in our lives. Recognising that grief, rather than dismissing it, is one of the simplest ways we can help someone feel seen and supported.
As an employee
Losing a pet can affect people in very different ways. Some people may feel tearful or overwhelmed, while others experience exhaustion, anxiety or numbness.
Our survey found that over half of respondents felt there was an expectation to continue working as normal after losing a pet**. If you're finding it harder to stay motivated or manage everyday tasks, you're not alone.
Many pet owners told us they struggled to function at work. “I wasn’t allowed time off when my dog died,” said one person. “I had to pretend I was ill. I couldn’t face work. She was my best friend.” Another shared: “I didn’t expect to feel so physically floored – I couldn’t focus, I couldn’t eat, I just cried at my desk.”**
How grief can affect you at work
"Many people judge themselves for not coping," says Dr Erin Hope Thompson. "But grief is a stressful life experience. Your body is responding differently, and that affects how your brain works too."
You might notice changes such as:
- finding it harder to focus on tasks
- feeling overwhelmed by normal workloads
- forgetfulness or making mistakes
- withdrawing from colleagues
- feeling more emotional than usual
- irritability or frustration
- tiredness due to disrupted sleep
- lack of motivation
- anxiety about returning home to an empty house
These reactions are common after losing a pet and can make work feel harder than usual.
Can you get bereavement leave for a pet?
Some workplaces offer compassionate leave or wellbeing support following the loss of a pet, but policies vary between employers. If your workplace doesn’t offer bereavement leave for pets, you may still be able to access support through annual leave, flexible working or wellbeing services.
If you feel comfortable, consider speaking openly with your line manager or HR team about what might help you cope. For some people, this may mean taking a few days away from work. Others may benefit from temporary adjustments, such as working from home, moving non-urgent meetings or reducing workloads during this difficult time.
Our survey found that 73% of respondents said time off work would have helped them when grieving their pet.
Try to focus on what would help you manage work and your own wellbeing during the first few days, weeks or months.
You don’t have to pretend everything’s fine. We’d love to see more workplaces recognising the impact of pet grief.
How to speak to your employer
Talking about pet grief at work can feel daunting, especially if you’re worried others may not understand how deeply you’re affected. In our survey, one in ten respondents said they didn’t tell their employer about their loss at all.
When you’re ready, try speaking honestly about how you’re coping and what support might help. This could include time off, temporary flexibility or simply letting your manager know you may be struggling for a while.
“If you're finding it hard to express how you're feeling, try the ‘Fact – Feel – Want’ method,” advises Andy Hawkins, Pet Bereavement Therapist. “Speak honestly and ask for what you need.
"My pet died – I feel heartbroken – I’d appreciate a little space and time to process this."
If you're worried your employer won't understand the significance of pet loss, it's fine to keep the details private. Dr Erin Hope Thompson suggests saying that your family has experienced a loss if that feels more accurate. "It's a factual way to explain what you're going through without inviting judgement about the nature of your loss."
If speaking face-to-face feels overwhelming, you may prefer to send an email instead.
Example email to your employer
Subject: Personal bereavement support
Hi [manager’s name],
I wanted to let you know that I've recently experienced the loss of a much-loved pet / a bereavement and I'm finding it hard to cope. It’s affecting my concentration and emotional wellbeing at the moment.
I may need a little extra support while I process what’s happened. I wondered whether it might be possible to discuss options such as [pet bereavement leave / flexible working / moving non-urgent meetings / temporarily reducing workload].
I appreciate your understanding and didn’t want my struggles to affect work without communicating openly about it.
Thank you,
[Your name]
Going back to work after pet loss
It’s understandable to worry about returning to work after losing a pet and becoming upset in front of colleagues. If you do take time off work for pet bereavement, it may help to ease yourself back in gently. Make small adjustments such as catching up gradually, blocking out quiet time, or asking colleagues for support with meetings.
Give yourself permission to grieve in your own way while looking after your wellbeing. Try to:
- keep basic routines going
- prioritise sleep, food and movement
- stay connected to supportive people
- talk about your pet if it helps
Some people find comfort in talking openly about their pet, while others prefer privacy. If you’d rather not discuss your loss at work, you could ask your manager to let colleagues know you’re processing a bereavement and may need some space. You could say:
“I’d prefer not to talk about it too much right now.”
“Thanks for asking, but I’m finding it difficult today.”
Your employer or HR team may be able to tell you about any wellbeing resources available, such as counselling or employee support services.
For more support and coping advice, visit our guide to coping with pet loss.
As an employer
Losing a pet can have a real impact on an employee’s emotional wellbeing and ability to cope at work.
"We need to stop asking who died and start asking, 'How significant is this loss for this person?'" says Dr Erin Hope Thompson. ”It's about recognising that someone has experienced a bereavement and responding with empathy and compassion. That's good for people, but it's good for businesses too. Employees who feel looked after are more likely to do their best work.”
Our survey found that 71.8% of respondents said they would be more likely to work for an employer that offered support following the loss of a pet.
Grief doesn't always look like grief
emotionally. This is known as presenteeism. An employee who is grieving may appear:
- distracted or forgetful
- withdrawn from colleagues
- less confident than usual
- unusually tired
- overwhelmed by everyday tasks
Make sure you know what practical help your organisation can offer, such as compassionate leave, annual leave, bereavement leave for pets, flexible working, counselling or employee assistance programmes.
What to say
You don't need to have all the answers. Often, the most helpful thing you can do is acknowledge the loss and ask what support might help. You could say:
You don't need to have all the answers. Often, the most helpful thing you can do is acknowledge the loss and ask what support might help. You could say:
- “I’m so sorry you’re going through this.”
- “How are you feeling?”
- "What were they like?"
- “What would help you most right now?”
- “Please let me know if there’s anything we can do to support you.”
Open questions can help someone share as much or as little as they feel able to.
What not to say
Even well-meaning comments can sometimes feel dismissive to someone who is grieving.
Try to avoid phrases such as:
- “I’m so sorry you’re going through this.”
- “How are you feeling?”
- "What were they like?"
- “What would help you most right now?”
- “Please let me know if there’s anything we can do to support you.”
Avoid making assumptions about how someone should feel or how long their grief should last. Everyone experiences pet loss differently, and grief doesn’t follow a timetable.
Other ways you can support your employee
Small acts of understanding and practical help can mean a lot to someone who is grieving. Depending on your workplace and relationship, you could:
- check in regularly without putting pressure on them to talk
- help prioritise workloads or adjust deadlines
- offer flexibility around meetings or working arrangements
- remind them about counselling, wellbeing services or employee assistance programmes
- send a card or arrange a collection in memory of their pet
- signpost to support such as our pet bereavement toolkit
- signpost managers to bereavement training, such as The Loss Foundation's evidence-informed workplace grief training
Grieving pet owner Sheryl continues to take great comfort from the portrait her teammates commissioned as a gift to honour her dog Willow.
"I have lost many pets throughout my life, and they all hurt, but Willow was my Souldog and my best friend, and 18 months later it still feels just as raw and painful. I miss her every single day,” she shares.
“My workmates knew how much Willow meant to me, and I’m so incredibly grateful for the beautiful portrait they made of her, as well as for the kindness and support they showed me. She sits watching over me each day while I work, and I can't stress enough what a difference it made to receive such a thoughtful gift at such a difficult time."
As a colleague
You may worry about saying the wrong thing to a colleague who has lost a pet. But often, showing kindness matters most. Our survey found that almost half of respondents said an empathetic colleague would have helped them while grieving.
Say less. Listen more.
You don’t need to fix someone’s grief. Listening without judgement and offering practical support can help them feel heard and understood.
You could:
- ask how they’re doing
- offer to help with meetings or workloads
- send a thoughtful message or card
- respect if they don’t want to talk
- check in again after the first few days
Some people may want to talk about their pet often, while others may find conversations difficult. Follow their lead and remember that everyone grieves differently.
*Based on the results of the RSPCA Pet Grief Survey 2025
