You’re not alone
Thousands of people shared their pet bereavement stories with us in our Pet Grief Surveys. Many said they were grateful simply to be asked about the pets they loved. Their words remind us that while every relationship is unique, many of the experiences of grief are shared.
Content warning
This page contains personal stories about pet bereavement. Some readers may find the experiences shared upsetting.
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Find your pet people
Grief is already an incredibly isolating experience. After losing a pet, that loneliness can feel even greater because others don't always recognise the significance of the loss.
Clinical Psychologist Dr Erin Thompson from The Loss Foundation says connecting with others who understand can really help.
"We bring together people who've experienced similar losses because there's something incredibly powerful about speaking to someone who just gets it. I'd really encourage you to find your pet people."
The words below come from people who wanted to share what losing a pet has meant to them. We hope that, in reading them, you'll feel a little less alone.
They were not just a pet
Every relationship is different, but one thing came through again and again: our pets were never ‘just’ pets. They were companions, family members, confidants and constants in our lives.
He was my companion and my one constant during good times and turbulent times in my life.
“You were never 'just a dog.' You were my safe place. My shadow. My heart outside of my body.”
“Not everyone has lots of human friends or associations and an animal can be that person to a lot of people.”
“She was my wingman.”
“He was my oldest friend.”
“We considered him our first child.”
“He was always my safe person who never judged.”
“He was often my reason to get up in the morning.”
The shape of everyday love
Often, it's the ordinary moments we miss most. The routines, the quiet companionship and the little things that made a house feel like home.
“I miss the way her tail would wag so hard you could hear it.”
“It was losing a piece of my everyday life.”
“They were my babies. I had them before I even knew my husband. They did countless house moves with me, helped me heal after failed relationships and then became my daughter's best friend.”
“He was by my side for over a third of my life.”
“I miss the pitter patter of her paws following me around.”
“I spent more time with her than any human.”
“He was completely embedded in our lives. Our days revolved around him.”
When they leave
Grief looks different for everyone, but many described the same overwhelming sense of absence and the feeling that life had changed forever.
“You were stitched into the smallest parts of my world. And when you went, all of that unravelled in a way I still don’t have the words for.”
“I've never known grief like it, and I've lost both parents.”
“The hardest moment was the first time I came home and his face wasn't at the window waiting to greet me.”
The love for a pet is as deep as the love for a close family member. Losing them can make a house feel empty even though the house is full.
“The house is empty without her. Words can’t describe how much I miss her.”
“The grief I have experienced is unlike any pain in my life so far. I am forever changed.”
“They were such a big part of my life. My soul mate. I'm still lost without them.”
And today, the magnitude of losing you feels just as vast as it did the day it happened.
Carrying them forward
Although grief never disappears completely, many people found comfort in remembering the life they shared with their pet and discovering new ways to carry that love forward.
“Because my love for you didn't leave with you. It stayed.”
“My heart didn’t heal. It just learned how to carry you in pieces.”
“There are so many stories, there will never be another Fred.”
“I always used to say to my husband I give him extra love because dogs don’t get as long on this earth.”
“Thank you for asking about him.”
“I'm sure his memory will come to mind one day and feel like a loving embrace rather than heartache.”
“Share memories and photos, try not to focus on why or how they passed, just all those years you spent loving your pet. Years to be grateful for. The thought that gave me some comfort in all that pain was: ‘As much as you wanted to love them all your life, at least you loved them all of theirs.’”
