Comedy calls of 2009

28.12.09

Every 29 seconds, a member of the public calls the RSPCA for advice on animal welfare or to report an incident of cruelty. Whilst the majority of these calls are of a serious nature, occasionally they range from the weird and wonderful to the downright wacky.
 

Our top 10 comedy calls

This year, our National Control Centre has taken more than one million calls and here, in no particular order, are our top 10 funny phone calls received over the last 12 months.
 

• Tortoise breaks down on motorway
  A member of the public called to report a slow moving tortoise on the hard shoulder of a motorway. After calling on the Highways Agency for assistance, they tracked down a deflated football!
   
• SAD seagull
  Someone reported that a seagull was looking sad because it was sitting in the rain.
   
• Arachnophobia
  A caller asked us if we could remove the spider from her bathroom sink.
   
• Bat takes up residence...or does it?
  An inspector attended a call about a bat that had been on a bedroom ceiling for a number of days. It turned out to be a damp patch!
   
• RSPCA must-have!
  A lady called our emergency telephone number to ask us to reserve a chair she saw in an RSPCA charity shop window.
   
• Friends fall out
  Another woman asked if we could collect her RSPCA catalogue from her friend’s house as she had borrowed it a long time ago and not returned it.
   
• Fragrant farm
  A lady contacted the RSPCA to say that the farm next door smelt and wondered if there was anything we could do about it.
   
• Furry but not purry
  A cat lover wanted advice on why his furry feline did not purr.
   
• Keep the quacks down!
  A hotel located next to a duck pond was receiving complaints from guests because their neighbours could be heard quacking.
   
• A helping hand for the ladies
  A man requested help to remove the ladybirds that were climbing up a wall at his house.

On a serious note...

Although we may have a little laugh at these stories, we would like to remind members of the public that our 24-hour cruelty line is for reporting serious cases or emergencies concerning animal welfare. Many requests are for animals to be rescued or to report animals involved in accidents.

The cruelty line operates in a very similar way to the 999 emergency services number and non-urgent calls could prevent us from dealing with a serious incident.

People with general enquiries about the RSPCA should call our non-emergency enquiries line: 0300 123 4555.

You can hear more about these calls and some of the year's best RSPCA wildlife rescue stories in December's wildlife podcast.